You’ve heard the expression “it ain’t over ’til the fat lady sings” many times, but you may be so enthralled in your relationship that you’re blocking out the screeching crooning that everyone but you seems to be able to hear.
There are warning signs, my friend, which you may not be picking up on. Luckily for you, we’ve prepared a list of ten ways to tell the show’s over.
10. Pity Friendship
His or her friends start treating you with pity, or worse, contempt. Get out, fast.
9. Hi, remember me? Your significant other? We used to see each other on a somewhat-regular basis?
Everyone gets busy once in awhile. Being busy all the time, however, is a definite heads-up. While it’s great that they have an active schedule, not including you in it isn’t a good sign. When they’d rather do their laundry than you, run. Soon they’ll be telling you that they need their “space”.
8. They avoid talking about the future like the plague
We don’t mean the standard discussing the future of relationships. We’re talking about their refusal to commit to plans for next week. If they have this much of an aversion to plans with you, perhaps it’s time to have a “talk”. Which brings us to our next point…
7. Communication, or lack thereof
Since when did your life become a silent film? If you’re unable to discuss problems and find yourself resorting to childish passive-aggressive silences that just won’t end, red lights should be flashing. Ditto for the one-word answers. Communication is key, and a good indication of where the relationship stands.
6. No sex, please
Straight-forward enough. With no closeness, there’s no threat, and it’s a symptom of a complete termination of communication. If your dry spell seems to be never-ending (weeks turn into months…) perhaps a re-evaluation is in order.
5. You get the buddy hug
You know what we’re talking about. As you pull out of the hug, you get the gentle pat-on-the-back which subtly hints “let’s just be friends”.
And if you don’t want to “just be friends”, you’re in trouble galore.
Forgive him/her when he/she messes up.
Listen to each others’ problems
Ask about his/her day and really listen.
Play together, often.
Let him/her have his/her space.
Create a special signal to say “I Love You” when in public that only the two of you will understand.
Remember the dates that he/she thinks are important.
Avoid lies at all costs.
Accept him/her for who he/she is.
Always remember why you fell in love with him/her.
Don’t get too upset if he/she forgets something that’s important to you.
Take him/her to do something he/she enjoys.
Show each other respect.
Say “I Love You” often.
Hugs are food for the soul. Feed each others often.
Laugh. Try to find humor in difficult situations.
Try to impress each other.
Let him/her know you will always be there.
4. You’re no longer pampered
So you’re stuffed up and mopey. Once upon a time, you would have been wrapped with a blanket and spoon-fed chicken soup.
Now you get a box of Kleenex thrown in your direction, along with orders to stay the heck away until you’re better because they can’t afford to get sick. And maybe, if you’re lucky, they’ll call you later to check up on you.
3. The telemarketer vibe is coming through loud and clear
This one’s easy to detect. If you find they’re constantly cutting you off or sound irritated by your call, alarm bells should be ringing.
If they’re adding nothing to the conversation or sound distant, stop ignoring that queasy feeling in your stomach and face the music.
2. Mood swings
Just as everyone can get busy, people do go through changes in temper and you shouldn’t jump to conclusions if they seem a bit edgy lately.
However, if they’re often in a crummy or depressed mood and refuse to talk to you about it, or if they nitpick at every little thing you do (i.e talking) this could definitely be a problem.
1. They cheat
Look, this is not a surprise. Unless you’re completely blind to all signs of relationship-turmoil, you’ll know, without a doubt, when they’re cheating. And you’ll refuse to believe it.
– This article originally appeared in NewFaces Magazine